Sunday, February 11, 2018

Value






/’valyo͞o/
noun
  1. the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.
  2. a person's principles or standards of behavior; one's judgment of what is important in life.
verb
  1. consider (someone or something) to be important or beneficial; have a high opinion of.

Don't forget to love yourself. --Soren Kierkegaard

Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting for someone to bring you flowers. --Veronica A. Shoffstall

You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. --Buddha

Value, it is a big word and can be used to describe a plethora of things, actions, feelings, or abstract objects.  Values in a social sense is the set of values, institutions, laws, and symbols common to a particular social group.  My intent with this post is to talk about value in the self-worth sense—valuing ourselves and loving ourselves for all that we are or are not. 

As a woman, it can be easy to devalue ourselves and internalize the illusion that we are insignificant.  I can only speak for myself, a woman, but we tend to compare ourselves to others—we measure our worth by our looks, place in life, marital (or relationship) status, our careers, and our monetary or social standing.  We use a false framework to measure our worth.  These things are so far from the true measure of our worth--our very existence is worthy of value.  Every single one of us impacts someone, somehow, in some way. 

Spending years devaluing my worth took me down a very dark path.  I chose relationships that I knew were not good for me, I chose jobs that did not challenge me, I spent money that I did not have to spend.  When I took the time to align myself with my true, authentic self I began to realize my worth.  If no human on this earth recognizes my worth, it’s fine because I do not need validation from anyone.  As long as I am comfortable with the person in the mirror I am winning.

This journey has been a series of ‘ah-ha’ moments, some pleasant some not so pleasant-- times of learning and growth.  I let go of self-judgement and judgments about others.  I rebuilt my self-confidence and am learning to teach others how to treat me.  I know what I need in my relationships.  It has been a process of falling in love with myself and rekindling a relationship with myself.  I let go of searching outside myself for validation and self-worth, that is an inside job.

If, for some reason, you believe that you are insignificant, maybe it is time to find out where these thoughts.  What created these self-defeating thoughts.  Why are you belittling yourself?  These thoughts can be limiting you in many ways.  Shifting our perceptions and finding the source of these thoughts can affect you and how you impact the world.  Gaining an awareness of how much you really do matter to this world will help you to find a new connection to the world and to the universe.  YOU are important  YOU are valuable.

I talk about being a life coach but I realize that some might not know what a life coach is or does.  A life coach helps you to organize your thoughts into sustainable actions.  A life coach helps you to live on purpose and take actions.  A life coach helps you to increase your awareness and live from the inside out.  Partnering with a life coach helps you to learn to control your emotions and to manage progress.  A life coach is NOT a therapist and will not explore your past or try to make sense of the past.  Life coaching is about helping you to start right where you are and to move forward.

If you are interested in a free session to see what life coaching can do for you, fill out the form (on the right) to get on my calendar.

Change your thinking to knowing that your life matters, and that you are important.

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