Pieces

Sticks and stones are hard on bones
Aimed with angry art,
Words can sting like anything
But silence breaks the heart.
~Phyllis McGinley, "Ballade of Lost Objects," 1954


Assumptions are the termites of relationships. ~Henry Winkler

I felt it shelter to speak to you. ~Emily Dickinson

Let us be grateful to people who make us happy, they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom. ~Marcel Proust

There are times when two people need to step apart from one another, but there is no rule that says they have to turn and fire. ~Robert Brault

People change and forget to tell each other. ~Lillian Hellman


My girls and I used to spend hours putting together puzzles. The time that we spent together is priceless because we had great conversations and laughing together. We would spend hours taking the pieces out of the box, turning them all over onto the ‘color’ side and then put the picture together. Initially we would construct the outer pieces and then try to build inward from there. Throughout the process we not only constructed a beautiful picture but we also were building a new level of intimacy into our relationships. We discussed everything from adversity to relationships, school to zip drives and everything in between. These talks brought us closer together. While recalling these memories I began to think about the foundation that it laid for the future of our relationship. Today we rarely put a puzzle together but the relational connections remain.

While reading Gary Smalley’s book Secrets to Lasting Love I was reminded of the importance of emotional connections through several levels of communication. It is so vital to building great relationships and making connections in order to withstand the tides of life. Love can last forever if attention is given to constructing a solid foundation and putting the pieces together as you go.

I recently met a wonderful man and fell head-over-heels for him. He is truly someone who I am willing to embark on the journey of life with but at the same time reality has to be in the sights too. I know that our relationship will sometimes take more work than other times but if we build a solid foundation then we can withstand anything. I know that we have to construct the picture slowly and pay attention to the pieces and if we miss or loose a piece then the picture will be difficult to complete. I have no fear when facing this journey because I know that he will be fully committed to the journey too. I am walking into this with my eyes wide open but also with him in my heart. I know that I have found a treasure and the rewards will be more than I could ever have imagined. He has unlocked the pieces of my heart that had been lost and/or missing for a long time.

I am not rushing anything with him because I want everything to play out as God has planned it. I want to move geographically closer to him but I do so fully understanding that it will change our relationship in many ways. We will have the ability to see each other as often as we choose instead of long conversations on the phone we will have to learn to talk face-to-face. I believe that interacting with one another and adding our children into the mix is what we need to ensure that we are on the right path. At the same time we have to learn to communicate effectively and openly in order to make it work. Communication is the link to building a meaningful relationship so we have to walk through each stage in order to have a solid foundation.

Here is a good article about communication: Learning to Communicate