Lost, Part I

“Before you can be anything, you have to be yourself. That's the hardest thing to find.” 

― E.L. Konigsburg

Do you ever find yourself wondering who you are?  Have you lost yourself in something, a relationship, a job, raising children, etc.? Sometimes it take a devastating event to bring us to the realization that we (me) is not there anymore.  Where did I get lost?  Why did I get lost? How did it happen and when?  This is my current state.

I have spent a lot of years raising kids and trying to hold an unsustainable relationship together that I forgot to remember that I am important too.  Trying to please and care for others is exhausting especially, if you don't take care of yourself.  I put my trust and self-worth in those relationships but now that those are all gone, I find myself wondering where I am and what makes me happy?  What makes my skin tingle?  What makes my eyes sparkle?  What brings me peace of mind?  Where do I feel most comfortable?  What do I truly love doing?  I am on the journey inside (again) to figure these things out.  I need to find that true joy and contentment in myself and not give it away to others, I have done that most of my life.