Monday, April 9, 2018

Admiration





ad·mi·ra·tion

/adməˈrāSH(ə)n/

noun

1. respect and warm approval.

2. something regarded as impressive or worthy of respect.

3. pleasurable contemplation.


ad·mire

/ədˈmī(ə)/

Verb

1. regard (an object, quality, or person) with respect or warm approval.

2. look at with pleasure.

To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind.  --Theophile Gautier

Among those whom I like or admire, I can find no common denominator, but among those whom I love, I can: all of them make me laugh. --W.H. Auden

I have been having a bit of writers block lately, it happens.  When I get the urge to write, one word will often strike me and I will expound upon that word and what it means to me.  When stumbled upon the word ‘admire’ while reading The Grapes of Wrath--if you have never read the book it has been a good read. 

The book tells the tale of the struggles of an Oklahoma family who treks across the country in search of a new life.  Their farm had been taken and they heard about revived hope in California.  The story takes many twists and turns but speaks of perseverance despite the unspeakable adversity the family has faced along their journey.  The word admire came up when the characters are given the opportunity to take some much needed work.  One character says that they would ‘admire’ to get a job.  The word stood out to me because it didn’t seem to fit into the context of the paragraph but when I did some research, I was mistaken.  He ‘admired’ getting a job because with ‘wonder and amazement’ he felt he had been given this opportunity.

I began to think about the connotations of the word in several different contexts and found that admiration is not simply approval but also something that we take pleasure in and/or desire.  I not only care about the people in my life but I also take pleasure in their company.  I have built some very special relationships with my girls and with my closest friends so, I appreciate and admire those people that kept me company and checked in on me during my toughest and lonely days.

I think that all too often these days our society idolizes those who seem to constantly let us down.  I see stories everyday about celebrities who have fallen, broken their vows to their partner, or done something that got them into trouble.  I know that people will disappoint us but why do we look to people in the spotlight and not people who we interact with every day to give our affection and connection?  What is it about celebrity life that we admire and covet?  Stardom and glamour definitely draw us in but why can’t we feel like a star in our own lives?  Is it the monetary value of their worth?  Do you admire yourself?

I once heard, ‘rich is a state of mind not the state of our bank account.’  For me that rings so true.  I am very content with where I am in life but I do not have a bulging bank account from which to draw my happiness from but I do have many rich and fulfilling relationships that bring me joy.  I have never been a lover of money because money changes people.  I might not have the biggest house on the block, the most up-to-date technology, the most beautiful car and/or wear the most expensive clothing but I do not need those things for fulfillment.  In my younger years I did believe that I had to have those things but love does not come with a price tag.  I truly love and admire (take pleasure in) my children, my family, and my closest friends.  I enjoy building bonds and relationships with them.  My admiration does not come from what they can do for me it comes from my complete wonder and amazement of their character.  Another bonus is their ability to keep me laughing, I am a huge fan of having fun and I truly love to laugh with those I admire most.

This week, take some time to think about those that you admire and why.  Write about 10 things that you admire about those arounds you.  I would love to hear about your thoughts in the comments.  If you are interested in building those strong bonds with others, fill out the form (to the right) to set up your free coaching session today.  Let’s talk about how we can work together to help you build those relationships with yourself and with others.

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